Understanding Myself, Clarifying Direction

The past five years have been the most intense period of growth in my life and the most impactful for my personal development. 

When I first encountered coaching, it was purely to enhance my leadership skills at work and to learn better listening and questioning techniques. When I faced challenges in my career, I thought a coaching conversation might help me find direction, so I approached Richard to coach me. Only when I experienced being coached did I truly appreciate the power and impact of coaching. 

Through coaching conversations with Richard, I began exploring myself anew, rediscovering who I am, and clarifying what I truly desire. 

I discovered that I organise my thinking through dialogue, gradually clarifying my thoughts and what matters to me through conversations. Richard’s professional and powerful questions always cut to the core, helping me clarify my thoughts and uncover blind spots. He always had ways to help me untangle my messy thoughts, find order, and see a glimmer of light. 

In our coaching relationship, Richard approached things from the role of a coach but often went beyond that. Depending on my needs, he was sometimes a consultant, sometimes a life mentor, and sometimes a friend, but he never lost sight of his essence as a coach. 

During these five years of coaching, I went through many different life phases. Initially, I faced managing a struggling department, constantly on the edge of storms. Through our coaching conversations, I learned to help the department find its purpose and mission, stabilise the team, clarify roles, and foster team rapport. I relearned what leadership and management are all about and completely refreshed my understanding of team-building. Later, I began facing personal life issues, searching for self-worth and meaning, rediscovering blind spots and weaknesses within myself, and learning to deal with them. 

Honestly, each phase of the five-year journey has not been easy. The journey was challenging, and I often felt frustrated and disheartened. Yet after every coaching conversation, I would find renewed strength and direction, and joy would naturally emerge. Setting action steps at the end of each coaching session kept me moving forward. While I might not have felt much in my movement forward, looking back, I can see how my gradual growth added up to something significant and rewarding. 

During this time, I often thought how wonderful it would have been if I had encountered coaching 20 years earlier and learned these lessons then. But I know that time cannot be reversed. Every decision I made at each moment was the best I could make. What matters is to cherish the moment and look forward to a better future. 

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. While each tiny bit of progress in every coaching session may seem insignificant, it’s an astounding journey in retrospect. 

The key is that I know where I am and where I’m going, and I know I am better than I was before.